Three years ago, on April 2, my mother and Middle Sister played an “April Fool’s” joke on me. Please note: April 2 does not count as April Fool’s Day. My father was in the hospital in Mt. Vernon, Washington recovering the removal of his right kidney. I got up on the morning of April 2 at 5 a.m. to bathe and then left an hour later to drive an hour and a half to Seattle where I sat for an entire day in the Convention Center in a mind-numbing legal education class. I had not slept well the night before, concerned about my father and waking up for the alarm. After the class, at about 7 p.m. I drove to Issaquah and picked up my nephews who were staying at a neighbor’s house. I then took them across the street to their house, put them in bed, and dragged myself into the guest bed. The phone rang at 10:00 p.m. and my sister, with my mother on the line, recounted the following story:
“You will never believe who was put in the bed next to Dad today!” Middle Sister exclaimed, excitedly.
“Do I have to talk to you right now? I am very tired. Can this wait ’til the morning?”
“NO!” My mother cried out.
“Jim Caviezel* [star of the movie the Passion of Christ] was injured somehow and they put him in the bed next to Dad!” (Jim Caviezel is a native of the Mt. Vernon, Washington area – see below).
“Really? What happened to the old man in the next bed? Why would they put Jim Caviezel there, aren’t there private rooms?” I asked.
“The old man was released in the morning and there were no private rooms so they put Jim there. But you wouldn’t believe who came in next! MEL GIBSON!”
“Really? What is Mel doing in Mt. Vernon? I thought he was busy promoting his movie.”
“He was but when he heard that Jim was hurt, he flew up to be with him. When Mel walked into Dad’s room he was scandalized by the quality of the hospital, threw a fit, and had Jim helicoptered out!”
“Did you get their autographs?” I asked.
At this point my mother and sister began laughing maniacally; I could hear them convulsing with laughter through the phone.
“April Fool’s!” they shouted.
“But it’s not April Fool’s!” I said.
“Who cares!!! We got you!!”
To me, a date is a date. My mother is a stickler for celebrating Washington and Lincoln’s birthdays on their actual birthdates, not on the conveniently situated Monday before and after. The 4th of July is to be recognized on the 4th, not the 5th or 6th. You can guess how she feels about Christmas and Easter. But I forgave the women this one lapse because, quite frankly, it had been such a stressful time and laughter, even at my expense, is good for the soul. I knew Middle Sister would not buy the photoshopped tattoo but it was worth a try, wasn’t it? (Angel, by the way, was the PhotoShopper and she wrote her own comments, which I think very eloquent.) In any event, the Sao Paulo Ink post generated the most comments thus far so it was totally worth it. Now, however, the tables have been turned.
In our family, the name Caviezel (this is the correct spelling, Mother) is both a noun and a verb, as in: “is that a caviezel?” or “are you caviezeling me?” Today my sisters say they have tickets to the American Idol finale, courtesy of a friend. They are flying from the 425 area code to cheer Blake on and say to look for the gang of four: Heidi the Ho-stess, Middle Sister, MCV, and KR. (I will not be able to do this as we will not see the show for a week or two, living in the Third World as we do.) Am I being caviezeled? I will need photographic proof, a video for instance, something that cannot be faked.
I have not truly caviezeled Middle Sister or my mother. Yet. But when I tell you we are having hot dogs for supper in China, think twice.
“James Patrick Caviezel was born on September 26, 1968 in Mount Vernon, Washington. His chiropractor father James and mother Maggie raised Jim, brother Timothy and sisters Anne, Amy, Erin as a tight-knit Roman Catholic family in Conway (Skagit County), Washington. Caviezel’s surname is of Romansh origin; his father is half Slovak (maternal) and half Italian Swiss (paternal), while his mother’s ancestry is Irish American. Jim attended Mount Vernon High School for two years and then moved to Seattle and lived with family friends in order to play basketball at the Catholic O’Dea High School. The following spring, he transferred from O’Dea to another Catholic school, Burien’s John F. Kennedy Memorial High. There he starred on the basketball team and graduated in 1987. Following high school, Jim enrolled at Bellevue Community College where the 6 ft 2 in athlete also played basketball. A foot injury in his second year, however, put an end to Jim’s hopes of a basketball career in the NBA. He later transferred to the University of Washington where he turned his focus to acting and pledged as a member of the Sigma Chi Fraternity.”
Conway is home to the Conway Pub, dubbed “The Pirate Bar” by Sunshine due to the Harleys and bandana wearing chopper riders frequenting this charming locale. Conway is right off I-5, between Camano Island and Mt. Vernon, Washington.